The Hooded Man's Pain
by Solafan
Summary: Set a few days after Cecil and Rosa's wedding. Kain is training furiously on Mount Ordeals pushing his body to the limit and trying to repress his feelings of guilt towards Cecil and feelings of love towards Rosa with painful consequences.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The sun's blistering rays fell down upon Kain as he stood crouched behind a huge jagged rock. Sweat was slithering down his face from under his dragon-like helmet. He ripped it off with a bloodied hand and shook his blonde hair free. Withdrawing a bottle of liquid and a bandage from his item pouch he stood up and surveyed the area. The top of Mount Ordeals was a horrifying place aimed to test the challenger. Huge jagged rocks were scattered about and heartless undead slowly dragged themselves around, looking for something to kill. Kain looked down and tried to gage how far up he was; he decided on two-thirds and then began wrapping the bandage around his hand. A shooting pain ricocheted up his arm and he held back a wince. He took a swig from the bottle and returned it to his item pouch. He sneered as a demonic red caught his eye; five Bloodbones were walking towards him cautiously, their crimson armour glimmering in the sun. He sighed, no sooner had he dispatched a gang of Bloodbones another batch of the dreadful monsters took their place.

He put back on his helmet, picked up his double headed lance from the floor and gritted his teeth. The Bloodbones hesitated for a moment before charging at him their cutlasses raised above their eerie skulls. Kain jumped high into the sky, he closed his eyes slowly; there was something so peaceful about being so high above the ground. It was like he was leaving his worries behind as he soared upwards through the air, he could forget about being weaker than Cecil, the guilt that burned at his heart and his love for Rosa… Kain felt himself begin to descend and he gritted his teeth together and readied his lance.

The Bloodbones stared up at him stupidly but before he could move he smashed into them. Two Bloodbones exploded on impact resulting in a splutter of bones. The remaining two got up quickly and swung their swords towards a panting Kain. He flipped to the right to avoid their attacks but one caught him in the chest winding him severely. In his hesitation, the second Bloodbone raised his cutlass and swung It down towards Kain's head, he drew up his bandaged hand to protect himself. He swallowed a scream as the blade pierced his already wounded hand. The blood splattered onto the Bloodbone's skull and it twitched in pleasure. With an angry roar Kain rammed his lance upwards into the skull of the Bloodbone, knocking it clean off. With another roar he spun the lance round to smack into the other Bloodbone, knocking it so far back it fell off of the mountain.

Kain got up weakly to the sound of it tumbling downwards. The intensity of the pain in his hand made him collapse behind the Jagged rock panting. He closed his hand and concentrated and within seconds a green glow surround his injured paw healing it slightly. He rested his head against the rock, his helmet making a 'clink' sound as it hit the stone. The mountain was peaceful for a few minutes, allowing him to get back his breath but soon enough he heard the sound of footsteps as six more Bloodbones drew ever closer.

"This is going to be a long day," he muttered to himself.

Several hours later and the hot scorching sun had been replaced with the dull light of the moon and the freezing biting wind. Kain sat huddled up in his tent, his helmet; armour and lance were laid in a pile next to him. The mountain was surprisingly quiet, but for Kain the silence was worse as it allowed him to think. He closed his eyes and imagined he was back in Baron and before he knew it he had entered the world of dreams…

_Kain looked down at the three children with pride. They were his children. The beamed up at him, their yellow locks tumbling at their shoulders. Kain looked around his house and found a woman sitting in a chair smiling at him shyly. The woman had long blonde hair half tied up and half falling passed her shoulders._

"_Rosa…" Kain whispered._

_She laughed and nodded before gesturing him to come closer. He obliged, standing before her with a burning want. She stood up and slid her arms around his neck and leaned up to kiss him. Kain leaned away in shock._

"_But… Cecil…" he muttered._

"_What about me?"_

_Kain turned around to see a man with shoulder length white hair and warm blue eyes standing in the doorway of the house ginning mischievously._

"_You… and Rosa," Kain began._

"_What are you talking about, old friend, I see Rosa as my sister, she's your wife. Go ahead. Kiss her. You know how much you've longed to."_

_Turning back to Rosa, Kain closed his eyes and brought his lips to hers, they felt delicate upon his and he shivered with delight. He ran his hands across her back, through her hair, along her neck but then her lips turned cold. He opened his eyes and reeled back in shock. Where Rosa had stood a Bloodbone now was. It had the usual skull but plump pink lips now danced grotesquely across its face._

Kain woke up with a start. He had fallen asleep on top of his armour, the spikes of which were pressing uncomfortably against his face. He got up and sighed. He understood the dream. It had plagued his nights many a time. His dream of him and Rosa together and happy while Cecil still remained his friend would never come to pass. He dragged on his armour, picked up his lance and headed out of his tent.

The sun was blazing in the sky again and six advancing Zombies signalled that the protection of the tent was over. Kain flew into the sky and watched as the zombies became smaller before charging back to the ground and skewering one of them. He shook the foul corpse off of his lance and used it to block the falling fists of two of the zombies but something was wrong. From the corner of his eye, Kain spied six more zombies approaching from his left side. He looked to his right and saw six more making their way towards him, their tattered clothes swinging in the wind. Kain spun his lance around knocking four away from him. The time had come to flee but more Zombies were now approaching from every direction and before he knew it they had overwhelmed him. He fell to the ground as the blows rained upon him like falling rocks. He almost smiled as the blood dribbled from his lips down to his chin.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered.

And yet more blows. His thoughts turned to Rosa as he heard the snap of his leg bone breaking. The thought of entering an eternal darkness and never seeing her beautiful face again seemed like both a blessing and a curse. He closed his eyes and let death take him. And yet more Zombies came. They crowded the area so much that Kain felt himself being pushed to the side as they all crowded to fit, before long Zombies were tumbling to their death off the cliffs. Kain dragged his nails through the dirt to try and cling on but soon he was tumbling down and down into darkness.

* * *

><p>Author's note: Thank you for reading! I hope you are enjoying it so far. Any questions please PM me.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Utter darkness. Kain wasn't sure of the exact moment when the sensation of falling, the sharpness of his pain and the swirling darkness became one but it felt like it had lasted an eternity. He believed he was dead or perhaps beyond death if it was possible. It came as quite a shock when the weird sensations stopped and he was able to open his eyes.

He could not see anything at first because his eyes were blurred by bloody dust. The detestable mixture brought water to his eyes and eventually he spotted a white figure leaning over him. At first he thought it was some sort of undead spirit but when he intensified his focus he found that it was a young man dressed in white robes. Kain identified the clothing straight away as that worn by white mages with its signature red triangular patterning and white hood. The man could have easily been identified as a girl, with his long auburn locks and elfin-like facial features. He had a purple staff strapped to his back and was grinning sympathetically at Kain.

"Looks like you've taken a fall," he said eventually, holding out a long slender hand for Kain to grasp.

Kain hesitated shortly before gripping it and allowing himself to be hauled up. He groaned in pain as the realisation of his injuries dawned upon him.

"You were in quite a state, very lucky that I turned up actually. I have managed to bind the broken limbs as they were literally shattered into pieces but I'm afraid you're going to need to come back with me to Mysidia for full treatment. I'm all tired out from training to carry out any more spells."

"Thank you but I do not ask for help from you," Kain tried to walk but immediately collapsed back to the ground.

"You have no choice, monsters swarm these parts and when nightfall descends, if the monsters won't rip you to shreds then you will freeze to death."

Kain pondered his options for a moment before allowing the white mage to assist him back to Mysidia, a village to the west of his training ground of Mount Ordeals.

The wizard village was peaceful and calm as they entered; Kain's armoured upper limb around the stranger's neck while the stranger supported him by gripping him around his waist. Blood and sweat ran freely down Kain's face as they hobbled to the nearest house. A black mage sitting outside, whose face was mysteriously shrouded in darkness, wearing pointy yellow headgear and sapphire robes glared at them as they went inside.

"I think I have a fan," Kain muttered sarcastically.

"Don't worry about him, he just wishes he looked as battle worthy as you," the stranger grinned. "You can rest here for tonight and I can heal your wounds tomorrow. Oh and by the way my name is Bos Lukka."

"Thank you, Lukka, my name is... Kay." And without another word Kain collapsed on the bed and fell into a slumber.

Kain awoke the next day to find that he had been stripped of his armour and that he was now wearing purple robes. He got up from his bed to find that he could very much walk and picked up his armour from where it rested under the table and put it on. He strolled outside to find Lukka standing there as if he was waiting for him.

"I feel healed, I owe you my life," Kain gave a slight bow.

"It's no worries, good training for me, if I'm to become a white mage anyway. I'm actually about to leave for an underground cavern not far from here. A rare herb has been found but the second group who went to harvest it have not returned. The elder has ordered me to go and find survivors and heal them if necessary before retrieving the herb."

"Allow me to assist you," Kain said unhooking his two headed lance.

"I hoped you would say that."

The underground cavern was just north of Mysidia. Despite his injuries Kain had been disappointed that they had not been troubled by any fiends as he was eager to see his new companion's fighting skills. The underground cavern, though, provided almost immediately a chance to examine each other's skills. Still within sight of the cavern's entrance a hideous looking creature turned the corner. At first Kain had thought they were to be attacked by a giant snake but as more of the creature emerged it became clear that the snake was only a third of the problem.

"Chimera. Hate them. Can't believe the bastards come in gigantic sizes," Lukka spat on the ground and aimed his purple staff.

"Do not dither too long," and with that Kain launched forward, thrusting his lance tip through the yellow forehead of the lion head.

Blood splattered on his armour as he ripped his lance out and jumped back to avoid a ravenous bite by the snake. Lukka grinned before darting forward and whacking the snake head so hard it slammed into the ground and rebounded back up. He then aimed his staff at Kain, closed his eyes and concentrated. The chimera grunted as if insulted by the assumption that it would wait for Lukka to finish the spell. It charged forward suddenly towards him but Kain jumped in front, stabbing the already bloody lion head once again. He felt a warm glow as the shell spell took effect and nodded a thanks to Lukka who grinned back.

Kain spun into the air but as he was halfway to the roof of the cavern he all of a sudden felt heavy as a ferociously cold ice took over his body freezing it to stone. He fell to the ground hard, the ice around him smashing to bits but he felt like his body had been smashed along with it. He cast an eye at Lukka who was wincing from the pain of the chimera's ice elemetal damage but he did not dwell on his pain too long. He raised his staff above his head resulting in a warm green glow surrounding both of them and immediately he felt as if he was back to full health. He spun his lance fast so that it became a blur before throwing it at the chimera. It sliced the goat and snake head clean off leaving only bloody stubs.

The Chimera ran at him, enraged about losing its two heads, without his lance Kain hesitated and it knocked him to the floor and pinned him down with its gigantic paws. As the remaining head went to bite him he dug his elbow spikes into the creature's neck and jerked aggressively to the right, splitting the creature's neck open. It collapsed on top of him with a sigh.

"That was a fight, eh?" Lukka chuckled. "Shall we proceed deeper?"

"That sounds like a good plan, should I also move this gigantic chimera's body from me with the power of my mind?"

As they proceeded deeper into the cavern a grim picture began to emerge. The dim cavern's walls were splashed in blood. It was not long before they came across the corpse of a black mage leaned against the wall—what was left of him. Lukka stopped and bowed his head and for the first time since Kain had met him he was not smiling, instead he was weeping silently; his hands clasped in prayer. Kain did not cry. It was not that he didn't feel sadness it was just that after all the wrongs he had committed, the people he had hurt and the friends he had seen die he had no more tears left to spare. When Lukka had finished praying they carried on deeper into the cavern passing more dismembered corpses the deeper they went in. Eventually they came across the herb, Kain suppressed a frenzied giggle when he saw it. It was so small, so delicate and insignificant and yet so many had needlessly suffered to obtain it. And not just the mages. Travelling through the cavern had reminded him of how he had journeyed with Cecil to retrieve the crystals that were stolen; the times of warmth from their brotherly friendship and the times of guilt from his betrayals.

By the time they returned to Mysidia night had fallen over the village and people had either gone to the inn or gone home. The few wizards that were out did not need to ask about the cavern as they read from their faces. A few black mages bowed their heads, their yellow hats almost tumbling off their heads to the floor. The two men were also silent as any attempt from Lukka to engage Kain in conversation had resulted in monosyllabic answers.

"I need a stiff drink," Lukka sighed. "I trust you will meet me in the inn, I must discuss my findings with the elder and pray for the lost ones."

"I should probably just book a room for the night, I must return to my training at Mount Ordeals,"

"Oh no you don't, I know nothing about you, a tipple of ale and the sweet charms of women will loosen that tongue. Something troubles you I can tell, us mages have a nose for such things," and Lukka walked away before Kain could protest.


	3. Chapter 3

**Warning: **Minor suggestive adult themes in this chapter

Chapter 3

The old Mysidian village pub was next to the sundries shop. The night time meant that the pub was full of white and black mages unloading after a long day of study. Four black mages were making the most noise at the pub. They seemed to roar with laughter ever half second, tipping their heads back with such fervour their yellow hats smacked into the people sitting behind them. A few of the more scantily clad women were attracting unwanted attention from one particular shameless blue robbed mage who kept grabbing out at their exposed thighs. A few girls eyed up Kain as he walked in but he barely noticed them as he strolled to the bar and ordered a pint. As he sipped he thought about how much the wizard village had suffered at the hands of the Red Wings. He had known about Baron's attack on the village even before Cecil had left to carry out the attack but the suffering that had gone on only sunk in once Cecil had told him about the hostility he had encountered when he had washed up there after the attack.

The Red Wings had been brutal in their retrieval of the Water Crystal, Cecil had told him. Men, women and children were captured or simply killed if they got in the way. Some Red Wing soldiers serving under the flag of Baron had even forcibly taken some of the women for themselves. He shivered when the thought of someone attacking Rosa came into his mind and he gripped his drink more tightly. He tried to judge the men as he swallowed more of his bitter beverage but found that he couldn't. He knew all too well what it felt like to act out despicable behaviours under the control of the powers that be and he knew that that guilt could not be drowned by any number of ales.

The Mysidian people had moved on of course, he watched them as they engaged in merriment and indulged in their pleasures but some would never fully move on. Cecil had told him of the plaque that had hung from the inn wall and that had saddened his heart. Kain remembered the words that Cecil had told him were written on the plaque as if it had been yesterday. _"Never forgive, never forget." _He realised with a sudden horror that the sign also rang true for him; he would never forgive himself for betraying his friends and he would never forget the evil he had done.

"I see you've already begun."

Kain spun around to see Lukka grinning at him, the long haired mage had cheered up considerably. He ordered himself a drink and another for Kain and sat down next to him.

"How were prayers," Kain asked.

"Comforting. How's the ale?"

"Comforting."

Lukka smirked and accepted his ale from the barman with thanks. He chugged it down in one go and ordered another before turning back to Kain.

"So tell me, mysterious Kay, why do you suffer trials upon Mount Ordeals?"

Kain paused before he spoke. "I am training for the day I will defeat the darkness within me."

"Darkness? You have intrigued me."

"You should be appalled rather than intrigued. I have avoided your inquires into my home for too long. I am from Baron." Kain said coolly.

Lukka nodded grimly, he very much remembered Baron's invasion of Mysidia as if it was only yesterday. His mother's screams at the hands of a soldier dressed in silver armour donning a red crest…

"Not all soldiers acted with such dishonour on that day but for those who did—"

"What's done is done." Lukka interrupted, forcing a smile. "Do you happen to want to purge the darkness from your soul because you are keen on a certain woman?"

Kain stiffened and Lukka sensed he had strayed into dangerous territory but after a while Kain relaxed.

"There is a woman… but she is in love with another," Kain muttered and he hastily downed the rest of his drink. "My best friend in fact."

"That is a bastard state of affairs," Lukka clicked his tongue. "Have you told her how you feel?"

"No… I would not risk destroying the friendship that I have with them. If friendship is as close as I can get to her then I will gladly take that." Kain said but he did not believe his own words, his heart burned for something more…

"Don't be a spoony bard. You must tell her how you feel. Seize the moment!" Lukka signalled for more drinks.

Kain shook his head sadly.

"Then you must forget about her. Wallow about her no more, there are plenty more," Lukka smirked. "Is she from Baron? Is she beautiful?"

"The most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on," and though Kain's voice was toneless his eyes brimmed with emotion.

"How would you compare her to the newly crowned queen of Baron? It is well known Lady Rosa is the most beautiful woman in the whole of Baron. She can't possibly be prettier than her."

"I suppose not," Kain muttered, burying himself in his refilled ale glass. "But you fail to understand."

"Oh I do? Do I?" Lukka said loudly. "At least you will still have a choice of who you will marry. My fate has already been decided."

"What do you mean?"

"My family come from a long line of white mages dating back to the beginning of the New Age of Magic. I don't know how it happened or what the reasons are but a feud developed between our family and another and over the centuries it became more and more violent. The current elder has given us an ultimatum. Either we sort out our differences or both families will be exiled from Mysidia. A truce was offered in the way of marital bond with by the rival family. Being the only male child, it is up to me to marry her."

"Can you not refuse?"

"To what end? My father has become a bitter and broken old man since the death of my mother. If I do not marry her it will result in us either being exiled or killed. My mother is buried here… I will not leave Mysidia."

Kain was silent for a moment. Not only was he shocked by the troubles such a village could have he was unsure of how to comfort Lukka.

"What is she like?" Was what he finally decided on.

"She is not unattractive but we have nothing in common and she can be cruel. One positive at least is that her talents in Black magic are unrivalled."

"I'm sorry…"

"If you are sorry then live! Do not dwell on this woman." Lukka spun around and spotted a girl with bobbed pink hair and a long red dress.

She was short but pretty and she giggled when she noticed him looking at her.

"Come with me," Lukka downed his drink and approached her.

Kain followed reluctantly and fashioned a smile upon his face. The woman smiled up at the mage and the dragoon shyly.

"Want to see me dance?" She said sweetly.

Lukka nodded eagerly but Kain merely shrugged.

She swept off her long red dress so that she was only wearing her underwear and began to spin and prance, all the while smiling at the two men. Lukka clapped encouragingly and even Kain was entranced by her beauty. Her voluptuous curves, her tantalising smile and her swaying movements had him under a spell. His mind firmly placed thoughts of Rosa to the side but his heart was agonisingly aware that it was lust not love that had his heart racing.

When the dance finished, the girl put back on her dress and gave a little curtsy. Lukka applauded and handed over a five hundred gil tip. The girl accepted the money and slipped it down her bodice. She smiled mischievously at Kain who grinned back.

"I think I will head home," Lukka winked at Kain.

"I will see you tomorrow," Kain said.

Kain and the girl stood uncomfortably as he thought of something to say. Many of the Red Wing soldiers and Dragoon guard frequently copulated with girls from the city of Baron but Kain hadn't been interested in such things, he had only had eyes for one woman… He almost felt as if he was betraying her then as he let the dancing woman lead him to the innkeeper's desk. However, he was tired of living a guilty sorrowful life while Cecil who had committed many atrocities himself in the name of Baron was now king and marrying the girl who _he_ loved. He slipped an arm around the dancing girl's waist, gritting his teeth angrily as the fury and envy of Cecil rose up in his throat like bile. Tonight he would have his fun and tomorrow he would tell Rosa how he felt.

"Our beds are 200 gil for the night. Will you be staying?" The innkeeper said, a smirk spread across his face.


End file.
